Parody: Eric Pickles Writes To Muslim Community Leaders On Extremism

For some reason this first draft was not used when the Government Communities Secretary wrote a letter to a thousand Muslim faith leaders …

We are shit scared that something like what happened in Paris, especially given this is an election year, might occur here in the UK. For God’s sake help us find the right response that tackles extremism but will not alienate Muslim voters. With over three million people marching in Paris saying “Je suis Charlie” we are just glad Muslims here did not say they got what was coming to them. Or if they did, I am not going to draw attention to it in this letter. Gunmen will not undermine our values of free speech, the rule of law and democracy. That is for a Conservative majority government to do at the next election. With your help we can achieve just that.

Young people are our future, and in an election year this message becomes even more useful to look like we care. They must be able to express their disagreement. Just not using extremist ideology. Or against what we define as British values. We must show them that there are other democratic options for expressing hatred. Like voting UKIP.

We need Muslims in the community to do the work of the government and the security services. You are best placed to help, and we are open to suggestions. For example whether informing on someone should have a cash incentive, or whether that might be haram. However we do it, we need you to be strong and do exactly what we tell you. Not that we do not trust you to know what you are doing.

You as faith leaders can help, by insisting British values are Muslim values. In return we will mention that acts of violence by people shouting “God is Great” or “we have avenged the prophet” has nothing to do with Islam. We will call it “hijacking” and not representative of the many violent acts in multiple countries which claim it is done in the name of Allah. If we concentrate on the alms that you give the poor and not the arms that are financed by islamist charities connected to terrorist groups, we might just be able to do this.

Anyway, if you can stress being British Muslims is something to be proud of, we will continue to say that Islamist fundamentalism has nothing whatsoever to do with Islam.

Eric Pickles

If you want to read the actual letter, that can be read here.

Article written by John Sargeant on Homo economicus’ Weblog

Follow @JPSargeant78

My Huffington Post Blog


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Filed under British Politics, British Society

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